What matters most!

After seven and a half years it doesn't really matter if he remembers I hate chocolate chip ice cream.

It doesn't matter if he puts it in a dish or a cone. 

It doesn't matter if his moods swing more than a weather vane.

When you've been together through all of life's ups and downs...

...

all that really matters...

In Case You Are Worried

So much talk about friendship right now, I feel the need to have a serious heart to heart.
NO!  I didn't say we were going to cuddle!  Get back in your seats!
I said, we're going to have a heart to heart.

I was at a training a few weeks ago and this question was posed:

What did Einstein say was the one attribute that drives the most people to the Devil?

Did You Seriously Bring a Knife to This Gunfight?

To Whom It May Concern:

Seriously?

Did you just interrupt my 'holiday' with your "I put my tampon in backwards today and I'm gonna blame it on the fact that someone was unkind to me 6 months ago"?

Did you then follow that with the accusation that my 'family' is comprised of a bunch of mindless drones who can't think for themselves?  Or the implication that any one of us are worried that we might be 'unfriended' for not sharing the same opinion as another?

Did you get a wild ingrown hair up your ass and say that any one of us are two-faced and cowardly?  That we are 'victim-prone'?  Or my favorite, that some among us are "a sorry excuse of a human being"!!!

Did you then state (after YOU dug up a disagreement LONG DEAD) that you're the one who is not in high school anymore?

When I'm not conquering the world

This post is especially for The Dame who is bitterly jealous of my most fabulous skills because she wishes she was half as awesome as I am asked for it.

When I'm not out conquering the weak and pathetic minions of the surrounding kingdoms, I put my creative mind to good use.  NOT THAT WAY PERVERT!!  Okay, that way too... but I don't blog about that.

Anywhooo...

This is Part 1 of my Sewing Tutorial 101 for anyone who is a cheap miserly bitch like myself wants to learn how to fashion some cheap and easy like most of the hookers around here clothes for the kiddos (because we may be a bunch of hookers, but that doesn't mean we want to dress our kids in department store skankism!)